Recently published in March 2020, Glennon Doyle‘s most recent book, Untamed has already been added to Reese’s Book Club and the #1 New York Times Best Sellers lists. It’s eye-catching cover, accolades, and powerful description make it a must have for your bookshelf.
When reading Glennon’s memoir, you can feel how fired up she is about women finding their voices and paving their own paths as she has successfully done. She left her husband after he cheated on her and began to pursue a relationship with world renowned soccer player, Abby Wambach. Glennon writes about how she is now living her life in an unapologetic way that awakens her soul. She is finally living her life for herself and she explains through her breakthroughs and stories, why you should be doing the same.
Here are my 5 biggest takeaways on how women can shift their mindset to live untamed, liberated, and free:
#1. Look inside, not outside for answers.
“The facts were right there in front of me to see. But the truth was right there inside of me to feel.”
Glennon Doyle, Untamed
When making decisions, Glennon has observed how females, including herself, tend to look to each other for approval. Rather than looking to others, Glennon believes that you should look inside yourself to your own Knowing for the answer. The Knowing is your inner individual consciousness and truth.
Have you ever made a big decision and went to others for their advice? I have found myself doing this less and less as everyone has their own opinions and often their input just ends up muddling what I really want. Try discovering the answer by finding stillness and looking inside yourself for how to proceed. Only you know what is best for YOU.
#2. It’s ok to feel.
“I did not know that I was supposed to feel everything. I thought I was supposed to feel happy.”
Glennon Doyle, Untamed
This one really hit home for me as I have been so frustrated with how society puts so much pressure on feeling good and happy. You are supposed to be a beam of positivity ALL OF THE TIME and that’s just not realistic. There are many situations in life where it is ok to feel sad, mad, confused, or down. Rather than numbing those feelings by staying busy, drinking, doing drugs, etc it is ok to sit with them for a minute and explore them and ask yourself why you feel that way. Your feelings are trying to tell you something, stop and listen. Learn from them. You do not have to stay in a bad place for long. I believe in giving yourself time to mourn and to work through those feelings before moving on; it’s the healthiest way to propel yourself forward.
It’s ok to feel a variety of emotions – it’s what makes you HUMAN (unlike the Grinch)!
#3. Be a model, not a martyr.
“Mothers have martyred themselves in their children’s names since the beginning of time. We have lived as if she who disappears the most, loves the most. We have been conditioned to prove our love by slowly ceasing to exist. What a terrible burden for children to bear—to know that they are the reason their mother stopped living. What a terrible burden for our daughters to bear—to know that if they choose to become mothers, this will be their fate, too. Because if we show them that being a martyr is the highest form of love, that is what they will become. They will feel obligated to love as well as their mothers loved, after all. They will believe they have permission to live only as fully as their mothers allowed themselves to live.”
Glennon Doyle, Untamed
“My children do not need me to save them. My children need to watch me save myself.”
Glennon Doyle, Untamed
I 100%, no 1000% agree with this! To be deemed a “good mom” society expects you to give up your wants and needs and play the martyr to your children. Rather than to suffer and to live your life for someone else, Glennon says that the best mother is one who lives their life as a model for their children.
“I was a good wife. I had three babies and put all their needs so far ahead of my own that I forgot I had needs at all. I was a good mom.”
Glennon Doyle, Untamed
#4. Being human is hard and you can do hard things.
“Being human is not hard because you’re doing it wrong, it’s hard because you’re doing it right.”
Glennon Doyle, Untamed
You can do hard things. WE CAN ALL DO HARD THINGS! Challenging yourself even if you fail will always be more rewarding than taking the easy route or not trying at all. Life is not supposed to be easy. I love working out and running, but you better bet that I tell myself that I can do hard things nearly the whole time to get through.
#5. Be brave.
“Whether you are brave or not cannot be judged by people on the outside. Sometimes being brave requires letting the crowd think you’re a coward. Sometimes being brave means letting everyone down but yourself.”
Glennon Doyle, Untamed
I cannot and will not be peer pressured to do something that I do not want to do and you should not either. Just because other people are living their life a certain way, does not mean that you have to follow along. Stop and think if it really serves you. If not, be brave and do what feels right to you.
“Blessed are those brave enough to make things awkward, for they wake us up and move us forward.”
Glennon Doyle, Untamed
Speak your truth even if your voice shakes and it is the unpopular opinion. I have always spoken up for myself and always will. I have learned that I cannot find peace with something without doing so. Some may see it as being stubborn or as being abrasive, but you know what it really is? Being brave. “Say what you wanna say, make it mean everything.” is one of my favorite lyrics from the song ‘Let Go‘ by one of my favorite bands, Matt and Kim. You are brave and the world needs to hear your voice!
“Brave means living from the inside out. Brave means, in every uncertain moment, turning inward, feeling for the Knowing, and speaking it out loud.”
Glennon Doyle, Untamed
Thank you Glennon for writing such a profound memoir. She writes so much more about her struggles with addiction, bulimia, and divorce but I’m not here to spoil her book for you, I am here to encourage you to read it for yourself and to get fired up right along with her. Become a GD cheetah! (You’ll get that reference when you read the book.)
Interested in what other books that I think you should have on your bookshelf? Check out my other Book Reviews.